Tangodurians

Hello 2022! Is this the year that we have finally recovered from COVID? At least I've stopped freaking out about being in a crowded space without the semblance of a shield called a facemask, just as I have mysteriously also never tested positive for COVID yet having the classic symptoms of its later manifestation. All that is to say, it's back to milongas and lessons in somewhat full force and having amnesia for the last 2 years. In the middle of Embrace Berlin right now which is an interesting coalition of turbocharged Tango milongas happening throughout the week, primarily enjoyed by the local community and feeling more of a home-turf Tango situation vs. an international weekend of cross country travelling. First ever lessons with Horacio Godoy y Maricel Giacomini and what a trove of historical/musical facts - musicality at its finest. 1930's Milonguero - 1920's and earlier music rhythm was based off a habanero rhythm with the melody line emphasising the beat on 1 and...

Off the back of a weekend that required me to leave work early and sleep cray hours to finally get back into a semi-human mode of work and sleep. Thoughts? When I first started tango, I jumped straight into a Fire & Ice festival in Ann Arbor January of 2010. That was my first taste of a tango festival which was relatively social and a good scene in hindsight. Coming back to Malaysia I've participated in the KL Festival every single year, Singapore festival twice, Taiwan festival once (24 hour on a whim - fuck it all flight), Shanghai festival once. Other than that the flavour of the day nowadays is definitely geared more toward marathons/encuentros, and for a good reason. Festivals in this part of the world are seriously so tipped toward a certain "type" that it is far more worth my money and sanity to go for the social dancing rather than the festival format. Granted, lessons were good, always learning, picking up new things. Competition was, so-so for me, was...

It's been eons since I've written anything about Tango, even though it has now become so ingrained in my life and travels. Tango at this point to me is being used as an outlet. It's my yoga, it's my meditation. It's me traversing the world in 12 minutes, in receiving and transmitting, of letting my body become the channel through which the music flows through, of expression. Tango to me is at this stage, everything that I want it to be. Of course there's plenty of things to work on, but there comes a point where you are balanced in yourself and your awareness of this dance that allows you to express your truest "self". It opens different facets of yourself to you and I continue to hone how I communicate. It is true that only certain people "get it", or "stick with it" and more or less these are the people that end up being people I get along with. It's a bit of a screener for me too in terms of figuring out who I actually w...

Tango has meant different things to me at different stages of my life. Stage 0 - September 2009 "Tango as a differentiator" Expectation: It started out as a notion of difference - "I do the Tangooo" I'd drawl - red lipstick, long flamenco looking swishy dresses with ruffles and leave everything else to the imagination of my listener. Passion, fire, attitude, dominance. Reality: Tango is subtle, a conversation not manifested beyond the surface. Yes, red lipstick, no, not long dresses unless you want to rip it and trip yourself up. Yes, passion and attitude but quiet confidence prized above all. A meeting of equals, an intellectual conversation at its most developed state. Stage 1 - September - December 2009 "Tango as a dance" Expectation: Quick footwork, steps, technicality, sequences, stomping across the floor Reality: I am walking backwards in flipflops - wtf am I doing. Of course I can walk, ok I can't walk with someone blocking my...

To go forward you go back, to go left, you go right. Yes, sounds a lot like mumbo jumbo but its mumbo jumbo that works. Newton's 3rd law never came so much into play like it does with this level of teaching. CC 6 years ago loved new age stuff, seeked alternative tandas and poo-pooed MATC's stringent DJ-ing codes and way of teaching. Little would I know that this dichotomy continues and permeates through most of the world, especially in these surrounding areas, these surrounding countries. Re-discovering that taste buds have changed and much as like nuevo has become incorporated in some of the stuff we do, so has my taste veered back to danceable, dramatic but still traditional (read 1950's) music. Eeps. Tips to take away: - Embrace by sending out the chest, seeking for the other person's heart, everything should be led by the chest. Everything. - The arms then become a comfort blanket, changing and ebbing with the flow, but the heart is always connected. This ...

It has been a while since I have managed to bring myself back toward elements of beginning stages. Back to the days in tiled Union lobbies with an exasperated ponytailed guy telling me to shut my eyes and just feel. To stop fighting the lead and to surrender. What does it mean to be a good dancer? I sometimes think we are so caught up within this dance that we do not utilise everything else outside of it to inform our progress. Metaphors and imagery resonate so much stronger than describing a step ever will. What does it mean to be a good speaker then? Is it necessary to be Oprah before we deem ourselves worthy of the title? Hardly! Then why is it that we expect to dance like Rojas, like Hurtado, or any other headlining name? Maybe because Tango is so accessible, so fundamental in nature, like walking, that we believe we can partake in it, and expect to at a very high level. Truth is, it really does require training, it requires years of dedication much like ballet, gymnastic, yog...

There's been a growing sense of discontentment that seems reinforced after 4 days of jostling around the dance floor, not getting too many dances and horrible floor craft. The more experienced people are often never seen anywhere near a large festival and I often think this is for very good reasons. If the intent is to dance then there's no where worse to do it than in a large festival because everyone will swarm to the dance floor, there's often bad gender imbalances and unfortunately the DI culture is quite strong here to the extent that it will suck if you go to a workshop where everyone has a partner already. Granted, there were sparkling moments, such as the devil may care dancing from Noelia y Carlitos, the personification of a hurricane from Sebastian y Maria Ines and the beautiful music from Solo Tango. These remind me again and again of the gems that exist in this dance and the reasons why I continue to want to perfect it. Why do you dance? I'm starting ...

This years tango fest was...curious, in the sense that it was a funny mix of people who were not from the region and decided to show up, as well as quite lacking in regional representation. But above all, it was kinda fun, and yet again I find myself miles away from the seriously nervous dancer I was 3 years back and even quite recently last year. I don't know what it is but I've found my feet I guess? This grounding that I need to not be nervous and to interpret the music and not care about what everyone else around me is thinking. Eons ago wise words were shared with me on the dance floor of Vitosh Guesthouse by J. "Don't bother with them, they're all too concerned with themselves anyway". Some things come back from the past and hit you hard when you realise exactly what was meant. Had a couple of dream tandas, beautiful waltzes where my partner exclaimed "you're flying!" and proceeded to try and lift a very panicked me. If I could respond...

If we could dance with ourselves. If. That would be good, because then you'd know how you're initiating movements, how you feel, how you embrace. I mean, people have been very lousy at describing you to yourself right? After all, it passes through their judgement, their comparison filter, their physicality, their thoughts before arriving back again to you. But I guess just as we can never see our own image, in the same manner, can we never really know how we are like when we are dancing. How we are reacting to someone else. This is where the good teachers differ from the not so good teachers, because they are able to accurately explain your issues and more importantly, what to do as a result of that. This weekend I grasped a palm in my hand, and I could feel his heartbeat. That is what's amazing about this dance, the stillness and calm that occurs allows for a connection that we just don't get in life often, save between you and your loved ones. We connect on that ...

  Mauricio y Javier The Singapore Tango Festival was magical. Absolutely magical, mainly because of the presence of Sexteto Milonguero for two of the nights. Dancing to live music is SUCH a treat and it seriously made me feel like my soul was soaring. Some amazing dances were had. I got told by a lead who I hadn't danced with in over a year that I had changed my dancing style (better I hope), and I agree with him. Very happy with how I'm dancing right now, but obviously more to improve! Taiwanese guy made me so so happy by saying that I danced really really well =P. Self promotion I know, but it was a very smooth dance and there was a particular move that fit the music so well and with so much precision that even I was surprised. The final saturday at UP from 4-7am took the cake though. Beautiful environment, soaring ceiling, springy wood floor, gorgeous and friendly hosts. One not to be repeated unfortunately since UP is shutting and they're moving countries. ...

Ruben y Sabrina -Separate the body into three parts, shoulder, hip and leg -Elasticated points at the hips to the knees and knees to the feet. Be grounded, use the floor, if you are too light overall then you are floating like a butterfly, as a result the guy has no clue where you are. Lightness in the sense comes from the top half and not the legs -Think of yourself as dancing in a cylinder, always circular, always containing the energy, dance along the wall in this sense Martin y Maurizio -To balance yourself within the giro, keep the structure of your top half, collect your ribs inward, like a corset sucking in -When following the chest lead in the motion, think of it as your right rib cage always seeking theirs (when rotating to the left) -Moving back into the sacada, foot should be placed big toe first, rather than little toe Virginia Pandolfi -When preparing for the embrace, hips should be above the heel and your chest above your toes -The bend in the back ...

Converted my 2 workshop sessions into a private with Catarina and Gustavo. Also destroyed more of the Central Market Annexe flooring in the process. Oops. Privates are amazing-total focus on you, spotlight on you, also spotlight on just about every flaw you have much like pimples on bad skin. eeps. The first thing that I had to adjust was the embrace. Now, thinking back to the various ways that I've been taught about embraces, I will recall two people instrumental to the beginnings of 'what to do with your left hand'-Jacob and Dennis. MTango open embrace taught us to place the hand on the person's bicep. When faced with Jacob-I remember him telling me to put it in a position that was most comfortable for me, Dennis said that my open embrace as it was, was good too. Being a beginner then, the challenging thing was and still is to some degree, to figure out  how to adapt an embrace to the person depending on height and stature. Then came the Polish guy whom I had ...

"I am discovering what it feels like to dance with someone you are in love with.  Pixie is not the best dancer in town, but I would rather dance with him right now than with anyone else. His body in my arms feels familiar to me in a way that seems to send warm currents right through me. “I dance with you mainly because I just want to hold you,” he confesses to me. “Is that bad?” he asks. How can it be bad? Surely it is what tango was made for."~ Tangoaddiction Holy crap, this sums it up.

Dancing is something that we lose the older we get, the more we restrain our own actions with the thoughts that course through our brains, of realizing embarassment. Perhaps it started with a comment and furtive glances at each other on the dance floor bopping to Britney pre milennium-perhaps it started with the slow dances of Year 6 disco nights. Awkward, always. And then the statement that you have two left feet, no sense of rhythm or style and grace, some people are just born with it. But Tango somehow transcends all that, it's not a dance, it's an emotion. Above all a connection, with another human being. I've always fought for my own identity knowing what being a woman will connote in this life, yet in tango I willingly surrender to another. I give up my restraints and let the music lead me. And through the crowded dancefloor I catch your eye and the head-cock greeted with a smile. Embracing heartbeats reunited after far too long and foreheads entwined. Thank you...

...one moment on the final day of May Madness where we connected so well. The lesson for the day was rhythm and tempo and sorting out your minims from your crotchets and quavers in the walk. The linear grapevine movement and I was so not bothered to dress up with my left big toe half out of blood circulation! And we connected. So. Well. Last cumparsita's at Thursday practice at Kenville, being interrupted from a convo with a mich. alumni to dance. the. last. dance. I trusted you. I still do.

Took a 2 week hiatus off tango due to raya and other things going on, slowly but surely havn't been going as regularly and it's like slipping back into something that doesn't fit too well, but is all too familiar. I sat there and started the wishing again, it's been so long since Mason Hall MTango lesson days that I've forgotten that initial rush. What happened to worrying about MY own moves rather than whether I can do what HE wants to do? What happened to that? Have to try recapture it, and stop my mind from telling my feet to embellish, I dance for myself, no one else.

We always live our lives with so much anticipation, so much thought planned out to anticipate the future as best as we can. But lord knows, the worst thing you can do is predict the future with what you've known in the past. Life never works out that way. That being said, time to cast away the work of days and tango into the night =). To give up anticipation, and to feel.

I love you, I hate you, you make my feet hurt like shit and you give me so many bloody insecurities and bruised big toes I might as well hide in a corner and never emerge. I'll never conquer you and I'll spend my whole life (and too much money) trying to perfect you, before realizing what I needed was the very thing I started off with, but am slowly losing...rawness. I live you, I breathe you, you  brought  me in touch with so many people and a couple that are unforgettable...that's what you are. Maybe you'll end up being my bridge, my connector, in fact, you already are, to myself, to friends, to lovers, to memories, to a past to living in moments suspended together, to jealousy, envy, pride, embarassment, to futures and foreign places. To big old santa claus guys proclaiming tango as heroin, to musty May nights in Triangulo missing someone, to 24 hour flights and 4 day festivals, to reconnecting as never before, to La Cumparsitas x 10, to barefoot Tango in kitchen...

You know that feeling, that of connecting with the music, with the partner, with something inside yourself, with comfortable embraces and hugs. Because that's what it really is isn't it? The ability to let yourself be protected for a while by someone else, for surrender. Decent KL tango fest, doesn't help that 2/3 of the workshops were for dedicated couples and there are obviously too many girls and I miss my partner =(. But it was good, Traspie's continue to be impossible and there's only so much I can do on my own (duh, coz I'm following), but seriously ornamentation is horrendously hard. I'm starting to crave simplicity again. I have to stop forcing the moves, urgh. Hopefully AA will be good, it'll be interesting to see how I respond post a year+ in. Milongas were so-so, didn't really get asked that much and after awhile it takes all my resilience and willpower to not walk up to someone and just ask for a dance =S. URGH. Hopefully won't be...