Tangodurians

I love you, I hate you, you make my feet hurt like shit and you give me so many bloody insecurities and bruised big toes I might as well hide in a corner and never emerge. I'll never conquer you and I'll spend my whole life (and too much money) trying to perfect you, before realizing what I needed was the very thing I started off with, but am slowly losing...rawness. I live you, I breathe you, you  brought  me in touch with so many people and a couple that are unforgettable...that's what you are. Maybe you'll end up being my bridge, my connector, in fact, you already are, to myself, to friends, to lovers, to memories, to a past to living in moments suspended together, to jealousy, envy, pride, embarassment, to futures and foreign places. To big old santa claus guys proclaiming tango as heroin, to musty May nights in Triangulo missing someone, to 24 hour flights and 4 day festivals, to reconnecting as never before, to La Cumparsitas x 10, to barefoot Tango in kitchen...

Decided to do a list of all time favourite tango songs (which are slowly but surely growing! Seem to have a favourite one every week): Bahia Blanca-Di Sarli Danzarin-Troilo Vida Mia-Fresado El Panuelito-Pugliese A La Gran Muneca-Canaro El Choclo-Tango Libre To Tango Tis Nefelis-Haris Alexiou A Evaristo Carriego-Pugliese I have a penchant for dramatic orchestral violin sweeps, oh and rubato, and heavy "chunky" down-bows Siempre igual es el camino  que ilumina y dora el sol...  Si parece que el destino  mas lo alarga  para mi dolor.  Y este verde suelo,  donde crece el cardo  lejos toca el cielo  cerca de mi amor...  Y de cuando en cuando un nido  para que lo envidie yo.  Vida mia,  lejos mas te quiero.  Vida mia,  piensa en mi regreso.  Se que el oro  no tendra tus besos,  y es por eso que te quiero mas.  Vida mia,  hasta apuro el aliento...

3rd workshop of day 3 of intense tango fest and my feet and mind had just about enough. I went downstairs in the Union to get a subway and sat in the quiet that envelopes the basement during Spring semester when no one else is around. Teachers were good, met new leaders that I connected well with, was amazing having a La Cumparsita for every day =), felt so normal but I still missed my gaggle of girlfriends to laugh over things about and gossiping over shoes! It was brilliant trying to see whether a year on I could match the amazing skills that AA leaders have and I was not disappointed with myself, or with them. Where Leaders>Followers?! Gasp, shock, horror. But inspite of everything, the tango that really left me feeling connected was just general weekly practica with the old guards of tango. The ones that are always there, it was brilliant hanging out with them too and reminds me about how I discovered the other people that make up Ann Arbor, not just the undergrads, it...

You know that feeling, that of connecting with the music, with the partner, with something inside yourself, with comfortable embraces and hugs. Because that's what it really is isn't it? The ability to let yourself be protected for a while by someone else, for surrender. Decent KL tango fest, doesn't help that 2/3 of the workshops were for dedicated couples and there are obviously too many girls and I miss my partner =(. But it was good, Traspie's continue to be impossible and there's only so much I can do on my own (duh, coz I'm following), but seriously ornamentation is horrendously hard. I'm starting to crave simplicity again. I have to stop forcing the moves, urgh. Hopefully AA will be good, it'll be interesting to see how I respond post a year+ in. Milongas were so-so, didn't really get asked that much and after awhile it takes all my resilience and willpower to not walk up to someone and just ask for a dance =S. URGH. Hopefully won't be...

Hmm, I have to say I'm more stoked for MATC. Wonder why =P

It's been about a year since I've danced my last tanda. I can't believe I've let life and love and work and school get in the way of tango. The sad and horrible part in that is I feel like it will be a while before I can find time to just dance again. I've certainly lost any ability to dance whatever it was that I could a year ago. I feel disconnected from the entire endeavor and I don't know, a tinge of guilt that I've managed to let it go so easily. The school holidays are coming, maybe then?

Brilliant teaching, humorous, insightful, emphasis on axis and movement that I've missed so much. Reminds me of the level that Mtango manages to reach too on a weekly basis. Sigh. One of the best workshops I've done, learnt a wealth of info.