Skip to main content

Loss

I suppose we must grieve a little. Not only for the collective disaster that is happening globally, or the ugliness of humanity, or the looming unsustainability of climate change, or the destruction of equilibrium on this planet. Some more direct sadness in the deaths of 2nd degree connections, the stories of business destroyed, livelihood impaired. The direct and indirect way that everything in this planet is interconnected, in such intimate and profound ways beyond our understanding.

I have not let myself feel the loss of Tango as deeply to process it. But herein lies the pain of losing an outlet that meant so much to me, that continues to hold sway over my imagination, that continues again and again to be my kryptonite.

15 months since my last milonga. 15 months since the last embraces of friends, partners, buddies. In a way, it captures exactly the pain of the world, of lost connections and the ability to be in each others presence without the looming fear of worry and the potential of a lightning strike.

I had a chat with a close tango friend of mine recently about what she felt about the dance now, she made the observation that Tango without the ability to truly let go, to be transported to another time, space and memory, was not a Tango that she believed she would enjoy. I daresay I do agree.

There is going to be some collective trauma that needs to be overcome, not only in the personal judgement of the safety of the dance, but also in what it means to each of us personally moving forward. Shall we lapse back into the judgemental, divisive nature and negativity that Tango can sometimes reach? Or will we truly heal and improve ourselves in the ways that make us remember over and over again how this dance asks from us to be the best version of ourselves possible on the floor.

Will I be changed when I step back on the dance floor again?
Will I rediscover the beauty of being a novice?
Will I reset my patterns and old habits?

All I can wish for, is to be honest. To remember this time as it is, encapsulated. To hope that this is the last stretch of the race back to humanity.

I miss you my old friend. My lover. My torment. My passion. My sanity.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Tango Diaries: Lesson with Alejandro Gée and his partner, Joujou

My Tango Diaries: Lesson with Alejandro Gée and his partner, Joujou : From Alejandro Gée's studio - more pictures and info from his website here: http://tangoalejandrogee.com/ The Lesson with Alejan... 1.) Sink into the standing knee first instead of stepping/falling straight back into the back step. (I've heard that before - not sure why I can't seem to remember to do that.) According to Alejandro, basically the sequence would be: 1. Sink the weight into the floor through the standing leg (here’s where the knee bends slightly in order to be able to push the weight of the body back in the next step), while straight,   free leg extends backwards   caressing the floor with no weight on it and torso reaches towards the partner.   The standing hip is strong and grounded, the free hip is relaxed and opening backwards as a natural continuation of the leg. The knee is straight. 2.   Weight transfer: heel of the leg extended backwards goes into the floor and ...
2 comments
Read more

Simple

After the countless videos, watching the performances by passing Tango teachers, performances by stage Tango dancers, sitting and absorbing Milongas, the one couple that sticks in my mind has to be T and his fiance who met through Tango in Argentina. Their seamless blending, the fact that she didn't even need to be wearing shoes and their swapping of roles. Even though I was exposed to this early on the clueless beginnings of Tango, you could already appreciate the intimacy between the two. In hindsight after a bit more experience, it becomes even clearer that, that would be the ultimate Tango experience. It's like staring at something without the tools to understand it, then later when you come back with the tools in hand, it hits you, "ah hah!" that's what it is! It's like being told, "this will be useful in life later, trust me", and staring at math sets that have no correlation with your life, until later when you're facing a job assessme...
2 comments
Read more

Stages

It's funny how I often think of topics to write at moments where I have nothing to write them on, which results in me typing a one-liner in my sms column as a trigger which later when I go back to refer to tends to make absolutely no sense to me! But yes anyway, Tango stages! 1) You have entirely NO idea what the hell the dance is about and walking seems like the most impossible thing to do. You jump up and down inside when you finally manage 5 meters w/o crashing into each other and are elated when the instructor comes over and leads you in a way that you actually feel like you know what you doing. You go away completely and utterly motivated to want to know more. 2) Basics are handed to you, ochos! impossible things! Molinete's! wtf, my legs can do that....omg leader why are you a beginner too! 3)Sacadas and ganchos and all the other good stuff. Now we're talking. 4)After getting to know the community and everyone around (obviously Tango isn't just a dance, ...
Post a Comment
Read more